The Morgue is a podcast created by Noah Foster to replace the podcast Autopsy of A Crime which ended when Piper Shaw was revealed as the Lakewood Slasher and then was killed in self-defense by Audrey Jensen and Emma Duval. Noah claims that he is only co-opting Piper's listeners from Autopsy of a Crime when Audrey tell him to reconsider inheriting a psycho killers web legacy.


Season 1


  • Noah: Hey, guys, this is Noah Foster, local student and survivor of the Lakewood Slasher murders, guest podcasting the final chapter of Autopsy of a Crime for your former host, the now-deceased criminal mastermind behind the killings, Piper Shaw. So having made it to the end of our very own slasher movie, I think we're all just processing what we've lost and how to move on. Staring death in the face has a way of making you want to be a little more forgiving.Hey.Maybe we'll find that the loss of someone we loved may lead to the promise of someone new. Maybe we'll see this as a second chance to do things differently and make a change for the good. Or to wipe the slate clean and re-invent ourselves as someone new. At the end of the day, we're all just grateful that it's over and that the Lakewood Slasher is dead, but there's still one thing I can't figure out. Piper Shaw confessed to her crimes in classic villain fashion, but she did explain who attacked her and Will Belmont in that abandoned building. I mean, sure, she could've banged herself on the head and made up the story, but Will confirmed it later. Much as I love a good Hollywood ending, I can't help but wonder, who was wearing the mask that night? Am I just overthinking it? Or is there more to come?

Season 2

"I Know What You Did Last Summer"

  • Emma: People call me a final girl, but we're all final girls in Lakewood.
  • Noah: And final boys.
  • Emma: Right, because we survived. And, now, we're here to help each other find find a way to get back to normal.
  • Noah: The final thoughts of one of Lakewood's final kids. This is Noah Foster and you're listening to The Morgue.


  • Noah: Welcome back, horror fans. Wish I had an exciting reveal for you tonight, but in my humble opinion, suspense is underrated. The thing about the truth is it's hard to pin down. It's hot and cold. You hope it's one thing, but deep down, you know it's something else. Of course I want there to be something amazing when I open that locker tomorrow but part of me knows, when I do finally get my big reveal, I'm not gonna like what I find.

"Jeepers Creepers"

  • Noah: It's been one day since Jake Fitzgerald's body was found, and the grizzly reality of how he died is settling in. That sort of grief is a tricky thing. You don't know what to feel. Should you be furious? Should you be frightened? Should you be sad? It can swallow you up or weigh you down or ignite a fire inside you. When murder hits this close to home it makes you see the world in a new way. People, too. Even the ones you trust start to look a little different. Because when everyone's a suspect, there is no innocence.

"Jeepers Creepers" (Recorded but not Broadcasted)

  • Noah: Testing, testing. Welcome to The Morgue. I thought you were going home.
  • Audrey: I was but if I don't tell you this tonight, I may never be able to.
  • Noah: Okay, go.
  • Audrey: I know why the killer is after me.He knows what I've done and that I would do anything to keep it secret. I brought Piper to Lakewood. I was so alone and-and-and pissed at the world, so I found Piper. I begged her to come to Lakewood and help me research for a documentary about Brandon James. The thing about Brandon is, he may have looked different, but he wasn't a monster. He was like me. He was alone, rejected, and angry.It was Lakewood that turned him into a monster. When people started dying, Piper swore to me that it wasn't her, and I believed her, and now now, I'm paying for my mistakes for all that blood. I deserve this.
  • Noah: If you believe that, then Piper and this sicko win. You're not a monster, Audrey. You're a victim.
  • Audrey:Promise me you won't tell Emma.I need to be the one to do it.

"Village of the Damned"

  • Noah: Happy centennial birthday Lakewood. It's that time again, time for Lakewood's annual Carnival. What could be more twisted? Look, there is no denying Lakewood is opening the beaches with a man eating shark in the waters, but it's what the people want, we've done it since we were kids. When it comes to Murderville, traditions die hard. So start the cotton candy spinning. Set the tilt-a-whirl at full tilt. The show must go on, the Lady of the Lake must be crowned. Who can fault Lakewood for needing for getting a folksy distraction from it's harsh, bloodstained reality?

"Heavenly Creatures" (Unknown)

  • Noah: And one last thank you for my loyal listeners for your condolences. Life is short, it is random. I've seen Final Destination, death is coming for us all and it can't be cheated. It is up to us to enjoy every moment we're lucky enough to have with the people we're lucky enough to love. You know tonight was going to be my final broadcast, but Zoë loved this show, just like you guys. She wouldn't have let me shut it down, or give up, so tonight is not the end, my friends. Instead, tonight we remember that is okay to be afraid. "The only one's who aren't afraid are the monsters". Somebody whispered that to me in a dream once, it reminded me that no matter how many nightmares Freddie sends us, we, the living, have wake up and rise up against the monsters. I'm dedicating this installment of the Morgue and everyone that follows, to Zoë Vaughn. Every time I press upload, I'll be thinking of you. Rest in Peace.

"When a Stranger Calls"

  • Noah: Well, it's official. Three months later, and Lakewood has survived another mass murderer. It turns out Piper did have an accomplice. Go figure! I was right all along. But none of us saw this killer coming, and believe me, it cuts deep. After a betrayal like that, can you ever really learn to trust again? Maybe the best way to move forward is to put it all behind us, if we can. Brandon James, Piper Shaw, Kieran Wilcox, all wanted revenge, and maybe that's the end of the chain. Maybe this was the last dangling thread. Maybe there are no more to pull. Maybe things really are back to normal. Or maybe, Lakewood, you'll always be Murderville. Only time will tell.




Scream (Season 2) If I Die Noah "Welcome to the Morgue" MTV

Scream (Season 2) If I Die Noah "Welcome to the Morgue" MTV

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